I promise to do my very very best, all the time, every time.  In business, in art, in copyright violations, in life.  I vow never to give less than 110% of my heart and soul to whatever I am doing, from ridiculing strangers on the internet to listening sympathetically to my friends’ problems and concerns.  I will ensure that my attitude is positive and my intentions pure each and every time I leave the house.  I will reduce my television watching to the bare minimum necessary for meaningful participation in our society and I will increase concert-going, charity-giving, ESL-tutoring to the maximum that my increasingly demanding schedule will allow.  I swear to exorcise negativity from my mentality and will try, try again every time I fail, fail again.  I will get up early, retire at respectable hours, and keep only the company of upright, forthright, righteous people.  I will stop picking fights with strangers in bars.  I will be the change I wish to see in the world, including but not limited to: being the millionaire I know I can be, and unleashing my inner middle-manager.  I shall not yield.